What God Meant

I read this yesterday on "Pursuit of Pregnancy " a blog that I have been reading. It was so touching. Reminding me of the doors God closes for another door to open.

What God Meant
Author Unknown

What do I think God meant when He gave me infertility?

I think He meant for my husband and I to grow closer, become stronger, love deeper.

I think God meant for us to find the fortitude within ourselves to get up every time infertility knocks us down.

I think God meant for our medical community to discover medicines, invent medical equipment, create procedures and protocols.

I think God meant for us to find a cure for infertility.

No, God never meant for me to not have children.

That's not my destiny; that's just a fork in the road I'm on.

I've been placed on the road less traveled, and like it or not, I'm a better person for it.

Clearly, God meant for me to develop more compassion, deeper courage, and greater inner strength on this journey to resolution, and I haven't let Him down.

Frankly, if the truth be known, I think God singled me out for special treatment.

I think God meant for me to build a thirst for a child so strong and so deep that when that baby is finally placed in my arms, it will be the longest, coolest, most refreshing drink I've ever known.

While I would never have chosen infertility, I cannot deny that a fertile woman could ever experience the joy that I know awaits me.

Yes, one way or another, I will have a baby of my own.

And the next time someone wants to offer me unsolicited advice, I'll say, "Don't tell me what God meant when He handed me infertility. I already know."

July

I can't even believe it is JULY!!! July has always been one of my favorite months! There is so much going on! July was always the time that my Grandma, aunt, uncle and cousins would go to their cabin in Idaho. We went with them in '90?...'91? Then we ended up moving there. :-) So then July was family month! I remember playing "Aminal Donimos" with my youngest cousin, Jill. She was 3ish and I was probably about 11 I think. I should have known back then, that I would love childcare. Really.... who can spend a whole month playing Animal Dominoes with a 3 yr old and playing nap time. By the way... playing nap time does not sound as wonderful as HAVING nap time. You HAVE to snore, the naps only last for about 5-10 seconds, and then you are "woken up" to be told that it is nap time again. Lol! But I loved it! I still get all confused when I try to say Dominoes. We went tubing, skiing, paddle boating, cooking with grandma, play cards, and so much more. I am pretty sure those years were the best summers of my life! I have been looking for all my old pictures, and can't seem to find any. :-( I put all of our "prints" in one box when we moved. I know it is somewhere "where I won't forget"! Lol. Here are some fun ones that I have been able to find.

Here is the view from the front deck. Isn't it beautiful!?

Hanging out on the front deck with the cousins. 

Brooke, Andrew, Patrick, Jill, and Bre

Bre and I chillin' in the hammock! 

This was always a tradition when we were younger. So cool to do it that year. Patrick and Laura were on there honeymoon. No idea what the "Mike Mason" half was doing. Lol! 

This was that same day. Fun Picture! First year Grandpa and Grandma (on the far left) were able to go. Also, Uncle Jason (Ranger shirt in the middle) was there! Again, sadly missing Patrick and Laura, but what a great time we had. 

July is also a busy birthday month! Today is my dad's Birthday! I so badly wish I could be there to celebrate with him. We did get to talk to him this morning. I love when I get to talk to him! I miss him!

July 13th, is my mom and my uncles birthday! They are twins! Funny thing: 24 years later, my aunt and uncle had their first born, my cousin, Mike! So, yes.... big day! The youngest cousin's birthday is 4 days later. Haha!

This is my mom, with her twin brother, and their sister. (L-R: Beth, Tim (Bub), Cindy (mom))

I LOVE birthdays! We did some traveling when I was younger, and I remember our birthdays were such a big deal! We got to pick whatever breakfast we wanted, and then we went out to eat for dinner-which was really cool, because we were always in a different city, so it was somewhere totally new! I know it seems simple, but I just remember it being so special!

This year, we are adding a wedding anniversary at the end of July! Andrew and Monica getting married! I shared one of their engagement pictures on my last post, but I recently got the link to there whole session. Besides the fact that they are so cute themselves, I LOVE the photographer! Here are a couple of my favorites!

Very Cute!

Beautiful!

Love the hair picture! So Fun!

Here is the link to the Photographer's web site. They are located in Boise, ID. Sara K Byrne Photography



Now, for the surrogacy. Got the lawyer stuff sent in. Not sure of their hours this week, so we will see when they get back to us. I was babysitting at Caryn's the other night, and was able to go through her packet after the kids were in bed. OOOOMMMMGGGG!!!! Hers is double the size of Brian's and mine! I think some of it should have been sent to both of us? But IDK... Hopefully she will be able to talk to the IVF coordinator and get some things cleared up. But I took tons of notes as I read through it! I still have to go through those notes and combine them with my packet, and should have a much clearer idea of the timing of Caryn's part. We are still waiting on a couple bits of info to clear up when we can do that so that Brian is home for babies birth. Just part of the life... If we were trying to get pregnant naturally, we would still be trying to time it out correctly. Just makes it more frustrating when you are also thinking of a 3rd party in the mix. There are so many things that I want to make timing work for Caryn for comfort, convenience, etc., but still trying to work in so that Brian will not miss such an amazing event in our lives. .... As for me, I just want to hold my healthy baby!

Brian will be leaving for the next month. It is going to be so hard, because I will not be able to talk through this stuff with him, but I think I am going to get so much done. I am always trigger shy when I have the option to run things by him, whether necessary or not. But during deployments and long trainings when I have very little contact, I have no problem making decisions.

I have some items that have been donated that I really want to try to do an auction with this month. I would really like to get 100 "likes" on our Facebook page. There are some really BEAUTIFUL things! (I don't want to say what they are yet)! LOL.

Click here to "Like"

I have also started looking into some other sales and service fundraisers. If anyone has any ideas, please let me know. I have also been asked this week how to donate other than online. I will put our address for this on a separate in the "fundraising" tab (that is not there, but will be ASAP... Lol). We are not asking for this. We are very grateful for all emotional and prayer support. We also hope to find some really great things that people use to be able to sell and make money that way.

Caryn's blog was featured on "The Special Surrogacy Daily"!!! Go to "Stories" and her blog is there! I am so excited for her! I love reading her blog!

Well, I am going to go spray some "Cat De-Stresser" all around my house just in case fireworks start tonight!