Day of Retrieval

The retrieval went very well this morning. They retrieved 8 good eggs. They will call tomorrow morning with the results of how many fertilized. Then we will continue to get updates over the next 5 days. 

My platelet count was 65,000, which is a little low, but after checking with the doctor that will be taking over my liver care, said that it would be ok to continue without going to the hospital for a transfusion. 

My estrogen level was 3200. That is high, but low for this process. However, they were less aggressive than normal because of my liver issues.

I am very cramp-y today. Other then that, I feel just fine. I will be taking a Lupron injection and a pill for the next week or so. This should get my body back to "normal".

That is all I have for today. Will keep you updated on the status of embryos!

Retrieval Week: Day 3

Last night I took my last 2 injections. The HCG (trigger) injection was red! That was the scariest part. I have heard that it was going to be a worse injection then all the others, but other than the color, it was the same.

I got a call last night from the IVF coordinator from the clinic. She let me know that all of our tests came back normal. I am not sure if that included the one that tested if I was a carrier of anything. That is on my list of questions for tomorrow.

I was also told a little more info from my appointment yesterday. I have 19 follicles total in both ovaries. My lining is 13mm. This does not matter because the embryos will not be going in me, but interesting to know that I my lining would be cooperating if we needed it to. Anything over 10mm is ready for implant. Also, my estrogen level is 3700. I know that is not something that matters in my case, but again, interesting to know.

I had to go in this morning for another blood test to check my platelet count because of my liver issues. I will found out about results tomorrow.

I am getting really anxious! I can't believe we will be doing this in 12 hours!

After the retrieval, like I said before, I will not be able to drive home, so I will be staying here one more night. Friday morning we will find out how many eggs fertilized. Day 3 will be Sunday, and they will call with an update. Day 5 is Tuesday, and we will get an update on the status of the embryos. Also on day 5 they will biopsy each embryo that is still growing. Then it will take approximately 10-14 days to get those results back. At that point we will know how many embryos we have available.

That should be about the time that Caryn will be starting her medication regimen. Yay! So we are on schedule for in vitro at the end of November.

Retrieval Week: Day 2

Again, thank you everyone for you support this week! We are in awe over every thing!

Today, I had another ultrasound with the doctor. The average size of my follicles are 19mm. They gave me the medication for my last injection for this evening. I am not excited about this one. It is a quite thick needle. However, this is the last one!!! THAT I am excited about!

No appointment tomorrow. Brian will be on his way here tomorrow night! I am so, so excited that he will be here! My procedure is Thursday morning. Since we will have 2 cars here, I will be unable to drive home until Friday morning.

I really know that with the little bits of financial confusion and the extra expense of travel, makes it seem like we made a mistake in choosing this clinic instead of one in San Diego. I have to say, that I do not believe that! I absolutely LOVE the doctor and nurses that we are working with! I KNOW this is where we are supposed to be.

Retrieval Week: Day 1

Finally got my computer on and connected to the internet.

Thank you everyone for the amazing support this weekend on the Psalm 113:9! At the time of this post, $949.49 has been donated by you! That is amazing! I continue to be overwhelmed by every notification that comes in! After talking to Caryn, we have decided to extend the drive until Thursday night. It would be awesome if we could get to $1,139.00 by that time! We only need 17 more people to donate $11.39. That is totally doable!!

We do have some more good news in the financial part. We have been given a loan from an anonymous person for $9,000! We are so blessed and grateful that was offered to us!

Next we have the Caryn's  meds, tests, and IVF to raise for. Plus, we are still fundraising to pay back the loan as soon as possible. We have to make sure that we have the money before Caryn starts meds next month. At least having a loan to cover it.

Again, all of these types of details are under the "financial info" tab at the top.

Now for the good stuff!!!

I drove to Indio, CA last night and slept a few hours at a friends house, then got up early to drive the rest of the way! It was great to have a couple hours already done. :-) The doctor checked the size of my follicles. The majority of them were at 16mm. He wanted them to be at 18mm before triggering me for the retrieval. I am going back tomorrow morning to measure the follicles again. Assuming they will be at the right size, I will be triggered tomorrow, and then the retrieval will be on Thursday! I will update after my appointment tomorrow.

Don't forget to check out the fundraisers, and the "FOR SALE" tab at the top.

Reality~ Part II

Wow! I am so amazed... AGAIN... at the way so many have pulled together to try to help us reach our goal. I know there are so many of you that want so badly to help, but are just unable to financially. I completely understand that! Even going through all this, I still see people needing help, and wish so badly to do something. But one thing I have learned in this, is that every tiny thing helps.
For every one of you that are unable to help, if you just reach out and share the story with 2 people, God will find the ones that are able to help. Many donations are from people we don't even know! I have seen so many miracles happen, and I am just praying that we will be able to get to our miracle!

As for yesterday's appointment.... We both had full physicals, and blood draws. They will be testing blood for all kinds of diseases. We are considered donors, since Caryn will be carrying the baby, so there is a bunch of extra stuff that they have to check. We are also testing my blood to see if I am a carrier of anything. They do a whole panel of over 100 tests including cystic fibrosis, spinal muscular atrophy, Tay-Sachs disease, and Fragile-X syndrome. If I am a carrier for any of these, then they will do the same tests on Brian. If he also is a carrier, there would be a 25% chance that the baby would have that disease. If this was the case, they have a genetic counselor to speak with, and this can help with preparing for the possibility of anything after birth.
They did an ultrasound on me to test my follicles. (egg sacks) They want them to be 18mm at retrieval. I have a bunch of 8mm ones and then about 5 that are between 10-13mm. I have 5 in the right ovary and at least 10 in the left.
We also filled out even more paperwork: waivers, consents, choices of what to do with each part of the samples and embryos when we are finished, or when either one or both of us dies, or in event of a divorce.... Fortunately, with being in the military, we are used to having those kinds of decisions to make, but it was kind of overwhelming.
We got home late last night, and I will be returning tomorrow night. I have another ultrasound and possible trigger for ovulation on Monday morning... at 0815. Must be done in the mornings.

Psalm 113:9 "Into the home of the childless bride, He sends children who are, for her, a cause of happiness beyond measure. Praise the Eternal!"

 CLICK HERE to view, join and share our Psalm 113:9 Event. How many people can we get to donate $11.39!?
CLICK HERE to donate at "Deposit a Gift". Click on link to "Registry" on the left.
     You can chose one of the $ amounts listed or enter your own number at the bottom.
Click on the "Donate Here" button on the right side of the page to donate any dollar amount through PayPal.
CLICK HERE to look at the many fundraisers available!
CLICK HERE to see the items available to purchase! This will be being updated often through the next week.

Thank you, ALL for your time and support!

Reality

Well, everyone... reality has kicked in! Just spent $6800 for just the tests and exams for Brian and I! So, with the medications, lawyer fees, that puts it at $9300 paid so far. If you will notice in the side bar to the right, that that is just over what we have for everything right now.

I will be updating details about the appointment today, but basically, everything is going great and we are looking at Tuesday for the retrieval! That is awesome, except that I just wrote a huge check! I hate this part. This is where I have to ask for a LOT of help, quickly. We have to have $9000 for the retrieval! Brian's test cost more than originally quoted, and then there are things that are due earlier than I expected. We are still working on getting a loan. (All of you just out of high school, remember that everything you do now, really does follow you for years and years to come!) We are doing as much as we can to cut our expenses and increase our income.

Please pray with us. We need God's guidance to know exactly how to proceed. We have to have this this week. If we don't have it, then every dollar we have spent will have been wasted.

If you have any thought to help at this time, please take a moment and pray about it. Maybe it is an idea of a solution that comes to you to share with us. Maybe it is a financial help or loan that we would pay back before baby is born. Maybe it is a financial gift that you have felt led to give. Maybe it is sharing our story to others that may have a solution for us. Maybe it is just continued prayer. Whatever it is you feel led to do, please let us know.

I hate asking for help. I hate feeling helpless. I hate when Brian comes home from a month of training or a week of training preparing to deploy in 2 months and telling him that "all he does still can't provide" what we want so much! ( I don't say that but that is how he feels). I wish we could take a year or 2 to save for this on our own. I am one that would say "if you can't afford what you want, wait. Don't expect others to provide for you." The reality of it is that we can't wait. We have a timeline for this. It does not just affect Brian and I. This affects another family that we owe so much to. We owe them to stay on schedule.

Prayers: Guidance, positive results, financial provisions.

Donation : "Donate here" button on the right.

Donation : www.pathtoourmiracle.mydagsite.com/

Ideas or suggestions : bebepapillon13@gmail.com

If there are any other ways you can help, please email me at bebepapillon13@gmail.com. Or you can call us this weekend. Email for phone number if you don't have it.

Thank you so much, everyone for reading through this. We are so blessed to have you all in our lives and from the help we have already received. Don't forget our fundraising page, and the auction we have coming in November! Christmas shopping!! 

Thank you!

Continued Injections... And A Baby!?!?

I have been doing the injections for 5 days now. Today, I didn't even hesitate! I was so proud of myself! But I have been extremely sore the last couple of days. Yesterday, all I could think is that I only have to do this for 2 weeks, and Caryn is going to hate me because she has to do it for 2 months!
Friday, we go to Arizona again. This time Brian gets to come with me! He has to this time. They will be doing a physical and all kinds of tests on him, and then we are doing cryogenic freezing of the sperm in case he can't come back with me next week for the retrieval. I will be doing some more tests and they will see how I am reacting to the medications. I am quite excited! Especially because Brian will be there. It will really be the first thing we have done together for this!

Exciting news in our family this month!!! My sister in law is pregnant!!!

I am so incredibly excited for them! And I am so excited that our family will be growing! I love it! Apparently, the baby is the size of a lemon today!

I have some great posts coming up this week along with our retrieval! I am going to be featuring some of our supporters!

DAY ONE!!!

**If you see I am wrong on any of this, will you please correct me? Thanks!**

Well, all the anticipation, we are now at the starting line! I have been sooo nervous about the injections! I keep feeling so overwhelmed with information, and I was afraid that I am going to do something wrong, or stab some nerve and paralyze myself! Haha! I don't think that can happen!....???

Brian was so wonderful to help me this morning. He has been joking about it, saying how he'll get to stab me with a sharp object and not get in trouble. But as we started, I could tell he was getting nervous. He read every word of the 3 page explanation of how to do it. We finally got to the stabbing point... he got ready... then he said "I love you" and did it! It reminded me of some zombie movie or something when they have a antidote, and it could save you or kill you, but you gotta do it!... ahhh so romantic! Hahah! I barely even felt the needle!

I have realized that I have not really been giving much "medical" information about how everything is happening. I think mostly I am still trying to wrap my head around everything. But now is the time!

Day 1 (Sept 15) HGH (Human Growth Hormone) injections start. This helps the body increase natural HGH in body. This will continue until retrieval.

Day 3 (Sept 17) HMG (Human Menopausal Gonadotrophins) injections added. From what I am understanding, this increases the number of follicles and eggs to develop in the ovaries. A follicle is essentially an egg sack(this part not 100% sure, but that is what I am understanding). Oocyte is the beginning development of the egg. 

Day 8 (Sept 22) They will start monitoring me as often as possible.

When the follicles reach 12mm in size, Cetrorelix (AKA: Antagon) injections added. Again, not 100% clear on this, but I believe this keeps the eggs from ovulation. The purpose of this is for them to stay and grow in the ovaries for the full cycle.

At this point they will be monitoring me about every other day until they decide it is time for the retrieval.

Then that is a whole new process! If you have any questions, ask me! That way I can find out for myself! Hahaha!

This is only about 2.5 weeks of stuff! This stage will be done by the end of the month! WOW!

***Speaking of it coming up soooo fast. Please check out our Fundraising Page. ***

There are all kinds of items that you can purchase. The sellers will be donating all their proceeds to our fund.

Appointment with Nurses Update

Well, if you are following our Facebook Page, You heard that I had my first appointment at the clinic on Friday. Again, SO much information! I can't believe every time I talk to a doctor or nurse, I am overwhelmed with information.

I have all the medications now, just need to find a place that stocks the types of needles/syringes that I need. I went to 3 pharmacies on Saturday, and none of them had them. I have been reading through the directions multiple times this weekend, and trying to adjust to the scariness of giving myself shots. I am so nervous about it, but I will just keep reminding myself that it will all be worth it! I'm hoping Brian will be home when I need to do the first one, and he can help me! Fortunately, I am so worried about doing the injections correctly, that I am less worried about the pain.

I will know exact dates at the end of this week, but it still looks like the last week of September is when they will be doing the retrieval. 

Why Surrogacy?

Why did we chose surrogacy?

I am still struggling in my mind with all of our past decisions. What if I never drank when I was younger? Would it be ok for me to have a baby now? What if we would have gotten married earlier? What if we decided to have a baby right after we got married, instead of waiting? What if I didn't eat that piece of cake that one day? Would having lost 30 lbs instead of 25 lbs make a difference? The questions just keep coming, and these are only my questions. Brian has questions. I have discovered many of you have questions.... Though very few have asked.

Many questions can not be answered, and dwelling on them will only make this process more stressful. There is one question that I CAN answer.... Why did we chose surrogacy?

The basic answer is: It was right in front of us. We had 3 options: Surrogacy, adoption, or no children. As I have said before, HERE, we had barely had time to process our situation before Caryn offered us this gift. Because of this, there have been times I have felt undeserving.  I have chosen to change my thinking on this. Remembering how amazingly blessed we are that we have NOT had to feel that loss.

The 3rd option, no children, is not an option. If that is what is meant to be, it will be. We both have wanted children. We were ready, but my body isn't. "If God wanted you to have children, you would be able to."  If this is true, the surrogacy will not work, and the next thing we try will not work. However, we (along with Caryn) believe this is a door God has opened for us. We are meant to go down this path for one reason or another.

What about adoption? I love adoption. Have have seen MANY adoptions, and how amazing it is for the child and the parents. Adoption can be just as expensive as surrogacy. Again...the surrogacy door was opened to us before we started processing.

I love that our baby will be part of us. Growing up, I always loved hearing how much I looked like my mom (and my dad). I love hearing Brian's mom mention the many ways that he reminds her of his father. I love teasing my grandma about our "crazy gene"... obviously inherited from her. :-) I know if we adopted a child, we would love them just as much, but I LOVE that we have this opportunity to have a baby that is part of us.

As for the other questions, I just try to ignore them when they enter my mind. Don't need to make this time any more stressful than it will already be.